Xavi praises the “unteachable” passing technique of Nicklas Bendtner

While Xavi did have one assist that led to Zlatan Ibrahimovic’s goal, it was the Danish striker Nicklas Bendtner who set up the two late Arsenal goals (slipping Walcott through and nodding to Fabregas). Nicklas Bendtner, described by some of his very own Arsenal fans as “less effective than my grandmother,” was praised by Barcelona’s midfield maestro Xavi Hernandez after Bendtner’s link-up play.

Xavi said in the post-game press conference, “We prepared for this game almost perfectly. We started the game well, taking Cesc Fabregas, who we thought was Arsenal’s best player, out of the game. But our tactics failed because we failed to recognize just how incredible [Nicklas] Bendtner is at setting up the players around him. His technique is unteachable. He’s so lanky and awkward, which deceives anyone defending him. We’ll be much more aware of the damage he can cause next week at the Nou Camp.”

After a journalist told Bendtner about Xavi’s thoughtful comments, Bendtner replied, “Well I have been saying for a long time that I am the best player in the world, and I think Xavi is one of the most intelligent men in the world because he realizes this.”

Okay, okay. I hope you didn’t believe any of that nonsense! Happy April Fools from A Football Report! By the way, if you haven’t participated in our Top of the League Prediction Contest, go on and do so!